The Wiener Philharmonic

The official blog for sketch comedy group the Wiener Philharmonic, aka "the Wieners" aka "Wiens" aka "your nuts" aka "you're nuts." Come see us perform!

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Vivica A. Fox is made of Skin

Last night, before The Wienerphilharmonic began our rehearsal, we decided to find out what was on the television. The WB has a show called "The Starlet", and it's about these 8 or so young actresses who really want to make it, but only one will become The Starlet. The judges are this gay guy, Vivica A. Fox, and Faye Dunnaway, who is 112 years old and still barking.

But seriously, these girls had a challenge before them: lesbian hot tub scene with a kiss.

After they did the scene, Faye Dunnaway really railed one girl, (metaphorically...faye was not in the hot tub scene, and there wasn't any "railing" in the scene anyway), for being what she considered "the worst word possible": "WOODEN"

She then elaborated on this one actresse's bad points by commenting that "she lives on Mars".

I felt bad for these girls. Most of them were really embarrassed and Vivica A. Fox was a total cunt to them, even though she has had so much plastic surgery that she is practically a robot. A twatty one.

One thing I did learn from this show and Faye Dunnaway is that I am inevitably Hollywood material because, (as I joyfully told the other wieners) unlike the actress who got kicked off, I'm made of skin and blood and I live on earth. I think that that puts me at the head of the pack. Last week I went to an audition for Robutussin and the other actress who was CLOSE to being as good as me was from Uranus and made of Poop, and I haven't heard back, but now I'm sure I got it. Furthermore, I think that means that the wieners will do fine as well, except for Lang.

She's from Earth but she's made out of legos. Too bad.

Hope to see you all at the show!
Love,
Jenny

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home