If you'd like to watch my heart stop beating

like a hummingbird strangled by an invisible fart, please deliver yourself promptly to 330 W 42nd Street, 14th Floor. Bring a time machine and binoculars so that you can watch from a distance without interfering as I drink 6 large iced coffees, one of them Marshmallow flavor, to eek the last beadlets of moisture out of the dehydrated whiskey-reeking fossil which is my body.



Also this just in: from now on, I will exclusively say "good bye" in the form of "ALOHA".