What's In A Name: Pretzle-Snack and other Modern Mysteries

Since the begining of time people have been wondering...what's her name? Is she cool? Since the begining of the 21st century scientists have been devouring ancient texts to devise a logical theory that will define a person in a single word.
Pretzle-Snack was at first thought to mean "She who laughs behind your back", but that was such a difficult theory to prove that scientists abandoned it just as quickly as they had picked it up and Pretzle-Snack was returned to the storage locker to stew. 15 years later, in 1955, a young doctor Reynolds-Rock stumbled upon Pretzle-Snack and picked it up to do his own analysis. Reynolds-Rock spent five years working altenately on discovering the true meaning of Pretzle-Snack (the closest he came to a REAL defininition was "Salty Bitch") and working on an answer to partially consumed food preservation. The latter completely consumed him and Pretzle-snack was left in the cold.

So, today, where does pretzle-snack stand? An a-typical surname or just another drop in the barrel, you decide. (and that's NOT rhetorical)