MSN: So Fucking Idiotic I Finally Had to Say Something

Every day, when I check my Hotmail account, I have to go through this page that's like, "TODAY ON MSN: CAN CATS FEEL PAIN?" OR ": BEST SOLUTIONS FOR BRITTLE HAIR" or like, whatever some random algorythmic program puts together from words within a Nexis search parameter of Redbook Magazine, American Dolls, Trivial Pursuit: Bodily Functions Edition, and Science News for Kids. I always sort of shake my head and go, "That's the opposite of important every day. Every day you hit the hammer on the head of total shutup."

BUT TODAY, I finally had to say something.

TODAY ON MSN: WHAT ARE CELEBRITIES' FAVORITE THINGS?

I don't know. what AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE celebrities favorite things? Did they tell you? Did ALL of them tell you? Do celebrities HAVE favorite things? Does Steven Tyler have a Sno-globe that is his favorite thing? When you asked, did Susan Sarandon nod and hold up a tiny iron horse? You know? or is it more like, "equality," or "waking up next to Catherine Zeta-Jones every day."

So what I mean is, I am finally going to click on TODAY ON MSN, because, you know what? You win.

Sean Penn's favorite thing? I don't know. But damned if I'm not finding out.