The Wiener Philharmonic

The official blog for sketch comedy group the Wiener Philharmonic, aka "the Wieners" aka "Wiens" aka "your nuts" aka "you're nuts." Come see us perform!

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Survey

HEY! This is a professional survey! It's NOT Jules van der Bien running something deeply personal by you to see if she's different than anybody else! THIS IS THE U.S. CENCUS BYEROUW, o-KAY??

1. Do you have any siblings?
2. How many per capita people live in your roof?
3. DO YOU EVER SIT IN A CHAIR FOR 4-5 HOURS AT A TIME AND THEN SUDDENLY YOU REALIZE THAT YOU SHOULD PROBABLY STRETCH BEFORE YOUR SPINE IMPLODES AND YOU OPEN YOUR LEGS SLIGHTLY AND YOUR CROTCH SUCKER-PUNCHES YOU IN THE FACE WITH A HOT PLUME OF SMOKE SMELLLING EXACTLY LIKE A COMBINATION OF REHEATED COFFE, ROTTEN BACON, AND PENIS?
4. is your baby registered with us, or is it a secret baby? also, do secret babies exist? please advise.
Love, the Sensus Burro.

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